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Ted’s Jokes – Short and curlys

Once there was a young man who had no success with the opposite sex.  He thought he ought to educate himself.  He went to a bookshop and after a long look around he paid a high price for a large volume called HOW to HUG.  That night he settled down in his armchair agog to learn.  It was then that he discovered he had bought part of an encyclopedia.


A Drinker at a bar announced that he and his wife had finally achieved sexual compatibility.
“How’s that?” said a curious drinker.
“Last night,” replied the first drinker, “we both had a headache.”


A Young bloke approached a group of ladies of the night as they strolled the Kings Cross pavement.

“I’ll give any girl $200 to do it my way,” he said.

One of the girls immediately agreed, and they adjourned to her room.

When it was all over the girl asked: “What was so different about your way?”

“My way,” said the young man, “is I owe you the money.”


“Tell me honestly,” said the businessman to his attractive young secretary, “if I offered you $10,000 cash to spend the night with me, would you do it?”

“Would I ever!” exclaimed the girl fervently.

“Well, I don’t have that kind of money,” said the boss.

“Would you do it for $10?”

“Come of it!” cried the girl indignantly, “just what do you think I am?”

“We’ve already established what you are,” said the businessman, “now we’re negotiating a price!”


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